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Gray divorce – one that occurs when the couple is nearing retirement – has been on the rise for a while now. Experts say there are several reasons for the trend, but the main contributor is that, with no job and no children, couples have more time alone together. In that extra time together, many are finding they are not happy or no longer in love, or that maybe they stayed together out of necessity, or for the sake of the children. In this scenario, the decision to divorce is not altogether bad, but there are some drawbacks.
One of the biggest is issues is that, sometimes, parents with adult children forget that divorce still has an impact. In fact, one college counselor recently spoke out about how divorce was impacting students on campus. Adult children with kids of their own can feel the stress of your divorce as well. Learn how you can help them cope, and discover what an experienced attorney can do to assist you through the complex legal process that lies ahead.
Understanding How and Why Divorce Impacts Adult Children
It is easy to see why parents may assume that their adult child will handle the news of a divorce well – and some do (particularly those that have watched their parents argue or have grown up watching one parent abuse the other). However, it is important to understand that, for some children, their parent’s relationship is a touchstone. It gives them faith that love is stronger than the garbage life throws at you; when your relationship fails, it can leave them feeling like everything is shifting and nothing is certain – even their own marriage or relationship.
Adult children may also worry about you, especially if you have health issues. They may become more stressed, start to hover, or they may even ask you to consider hiring help around the house. Rest assured that such concerns are normal and that you can validate them without feeling guilty about your decision.
Validating Your Adult Child During Your Divorce
More than anything, your adult child needs their concerns, fears, and doubts validated. They need to know that you will be okay and that they will not have to choose between you or your spouse. Keep in mind that you must back that validation up with action, and that means not disclosing more information about the divorce than necessary to your child and not making underhanded comments about your ex-spouse around them. Remember: your children love both of you, so watching you and your ex continuously hurt each other will only hurt your children.
Contact Our Wheaton Divorce Lawyers
At Davi Law Group, LLC, we strive to ensure our clients are fully prepared for the divorce process at every stage. Dedicated and experienced, our Wheaton divorce lawyers always strive for the most favorable outcome possible. Get the experienced legal assistance you need. Call 630-657-5052.
Source:
http://www.wral.com/divorce-can-hurt-even-grown-children-5-irrecoverable-effects/17245769/