Tried and True Marriage Advice

 Posted on August 05, 2014 in Family Law

Since almost every adult is aware of the frequency with which married couples divorce, many welcome any insight or ideas on how to keep their own marriages from experiencing the same fate. A recent article examined marriage advice from 10 years ago from a religious magazine. While not everyone may relate to the religious beliefs promulgated by the media outlet, these tips may appeal to a broader audience. Ten Tips for a Strong Marriage In the news article, which revisits a previous column from the early 2000s, both marriage experts and married couples offer 10 tips on what they would advise couples to do soon after they get married. Read on for the 10 tips they say will help to lay the foundation for a strong marriage. Be able to tell each other how you feel. Happy couples will let one another express their feelings while knowing that doing so is not meant to hurt them. Avoid fighting while sharing feelings and instead use it as a form of intimacy to help build on your relationship. Intentionally form an “us.” People who are in successful marriages work at being a couple by doing things together and sharing activities that make them feel bonded. Being a couple also means that each person in the couple is balancing their own needs with the other person’s. Deal well with conflict. Every marriage has conflict, and it is how a couple deals with it that matters. Growing in a marriage involves reconciling differences and avoiding behavior that is negative and damaging such as criticism, contempt, defensiveness, or stonewalling. Pay attention to sexual issues. Married couples who do not engage in sexual relations very often are undermining the emotional life of their marriage. Not only does having a healthy sex life put a married couple’s focus more on the other person, but it fulfills the need for intimacy. Give attention to the spiritual aspect of your marriage. Studies have reportedly shown that couples who share common beliefs have more satisfying marriages. Reinforce your mutual love and admiration for one another. Showing honor and respect to your spouse despite his or her flaws is usually a sign of a happy marriage. Remind one another of all the things you love about the other person regularly. Do small, nice things for one another. This adds to your relationship so that when a conflict arises, you have positive feelings to draw from so no one feels the relationship is empty. Build a foundation for compromising. Show respect by listening to one another’s point of view and take it into account when trying to resolve differences. Marriage takes work and that can include being upset or frustrated with your spouse, but successful couples avoid letting little things come between them. Think and act like a team. Married couples maintain a sense of fairness and justice about their life together, and realize that they are bonded by their role in each other’s lives and their common goals. Seek out a support system. Happily married couples are often part of a larger group of people who encourage and support each other. This may include a group of other married couples that have things in common. Divorce Attorney No matter how hard they try, couples are not always able to make their marriage work. If you are considering divorce, contact the experienced DuPage County family law attorneys at the Davi Law Group, LLC today. We serve clients in Chicago and the greater surrounding area.