The Right and Wrong Time to Bring Up Divorce

 Posted on November 09, 2020 in Divorce

If you are having problems in your marriage, chances are that the thought of divorce has crossed your mind at some point, and you may have even thought about bringing it up with your spouse. However, saying something out loud can often lead to a situation in which it is impossible to turn back, so you should think carefully about how and when you raise the subject if you choose to do so at all. When it comes to such a sensitive conversation, some times are certainly better than others.

The Wrong Time

If you have any hope for the survival of your marriage, one of the worst things you can do is to threaten divorce during a heated argument with your spouse. As much as you may be feeling it in the moment, a divorce may not be what you truly want. However, making your partner think it is a possibility can lead to feelings of insecurity. It also has the potential to exacerbate the argument or shut down future attempts at conversation that could help you resolve your issues together.

Even if you are certain that you want a divorce, an argument is not the best time to bring it up. Doing so can make the divorce seem like a punishment to your spouse, rather than a rational decision based on your feelings about the state of your marriage. It also may set the tone for all divorce discussions to devolve into conflict, which can make the process much longer and more stressful.

The Right Time

Perhaps the most important consideration in deciding the right time to bring up divorce is whether you are confident in your decision to end your marriage. If not, you are likely better off talking through your problems, or asking your spouse to attend counseling with you, without mentioning the possibility of divorce.

If you have already made your decision, you should try to wait for a moment of calm when you and your spouse are free from distractions and have time to devote to the conversation. Try to be clear about your reasons without placing blame, and be prepared to listen to your spouse’s perspective as well. A conversation at the right place and time can pave the way for an amicable, cooperative divorce resolution.

Contact a DuPage County Divorce Lawyer

If you are considering a divorce, an experienced Wheaton, IL divorce attorney can advise you on your approach to initiating the process, and help you reach an agreement that protects your interests whether your divorce is contested or uncontested. Contact Davi Law Group today at 630-657-5052 to request a free consultation.

Sources:

https://www.verywellmind.com/threatening-divorce-during-an-argument-4088210

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/how-to-ask-your-spouse-for-a-divorce_b_7367650