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When child custody and support matters are added into the divorce mix, issues may be compounded and emotions can arise quickly. Of course, every case involving child custody has different factors and circumstances involved, but in many cases, both parents wish to have custody of their minor children and have their own ideas about what children need during and after divorce. A recently published article suggests some commonly accepted advice regarding children’s needs after divorce may be missing the mark.
Stability
Normally, divorcing parents may be focused on providing their children with as much routine and structure as possible to provide them with the perceived necessary stability through their divorce. However, according to the article referenced above, recent studies suggest that stability may have a different meaning to the children themselves. Experts are saying that what children really want and need in order to thrive in light of their parents divorce is open access to both parents.
Domestic violence is an issue being discussed in communities across the country, but often has similar factors at play no matter where it takes place. A recently published news article examines the topic of domestic violence from some familiar angles in order to shed light on questions, such as why victims stay in abusive relationships and some of the more common warning signs of domestic violence. This information is useful no matter where domestic violence takes place.
Why Victims Stay
Many times, when discussing the topic or a specific incident of domestic violence, the question comes up as to why the victim stays with his or her abuser. To some, the prospect of leaving an abusive relationship may seem like an obvious choice. However, to those involved in such a relationship, it is not always that easy.
In matters of divorce and child custody, it is safe to say that things can get messy fast. The process of dissolving a marriage and making visitation schedules for minor children can bring up many emotions from all parties involved, and may bring out some less than admirable qualities in people. While ex-spouses likely have their own issues to address in the divorce process, attempting to come to an agreement about child custody matters usually brings up a whole other set of issues to address.
When a couple cannot reach an agreement about custody of their children and visitation schedules, the matter is brought before the court and a judge is asked to make the custody determination. Parents’ wishes are certainly made known, through them or their attorneys, but what about the minor children involved? In some cases, perhaps the court never hears their point of view, but in others, they make their wishes clear about which parent they want to live with and how they wish to spend their time with each parent. The question is, how much weight does the court give to a child’s wishes in a custody matter?
Start to finish, the process of divorce can be expensive and goes well beyond legal fees. In a divorce, most of a couple’s assets are usually up for grabs. This can include retirement accounts, savings accounts, real estate, and the marital home, just to name a few. In addition, each party must consider the financial implications they will face after their divorce is finalized. For many, that may involve starting a new life in their 40s or 50s, something that can be challenging both emotionally and financially. With all of these financial considerations in mind, the prospect of divorce can seem daunting and overwhelming, especially when a number of other issues will also undoubtedly have to be addressed. There is some good news, however. For those couples or individuals considering divorce, there are steps to take prior to filing for divorce to take into consideration in order to financially prepare for the separation.
Adoption can be extremely positive for all parties involved in the process, from the adoptive parents seeking to add a child to their family, to the child looking for a permanent home. While the situation may be most emotional for the birth parents, adoption can also ultimately be a positive thing for them, too, particularly in cases where they are not capable or equipped to care for the child. Likely recognizing the positions of the these different parties, Illinois law generally provides for the protection of all parties involved in the adoption process.
Rights of Birth Parents
Birth parents who decide to place their child up for adoption in the state of Illinois have certain rights about which they should be aware. Birth parents can go through the process with either an adoption agency or a licensed Illinois attorney who represents them in the case. Attorneys are generally used in private adoptions in the state. It is always a good idea to consult with an experienced attorney when going through a legal process to ensure wishes are being met.
While it is unfortunate that an extremely violent event involving a public figure is what has sparked a renewed conversation on domestic violence, many are saying the occurrence is simply bringing to light the types of domestic violence incidents that victims must deal with on a regular basis. As the conversation about domestic violence continues in the media and among the public, the overall effort seems to be spreading awareness and advocating for solutions to the domestic violence problem across the country. It can at least be said that these issues affect far more people than average members of the public may realize, and the problem is likely larger than many think.
Just how big is the problem of domestic violence? A report published by the Illinois Coalition Against Domestic Violence asserts that in fiscal year 2014, a total of 63 domestic violence incidents took the lives of 84 individuals, with many more leading to injury, and presumably even more going unreported.
Virtually all areas of law at least have the potential to change over time. Sometimes, the change comes in the form of court decisions, and other times it is through legislative action. Attorneys are responsible for keeping informed of changes in the law and any related procedure in order to provide their clients with competent representation.
Such a change has recently occurred within this state. In Illinois, Governor Pat Quinn signed a new law into effect that will change the alimony law in the state beginning in January of 2015. This law is expected to affect the maintenance and spousal support awarded to ex-spouses in divorce cases in the new year, and its exact effects will vary depending on the circumstances of each case.
New Law
The new law represents a significant change when compared to the old alimony law that was previously in effect in the state of Illinois. In some cases, the payor may benefit from the change and in other cases, the payee will be favored depending on the facts present. While the overall framework for making an alimony determination will remain the same, important changes will be added.
Going through the divorce process can be difficult for any number of reasons, but may be especially difficult when parents of children decide to divorce. Additional considerations not only come into play when dealing with legal aspects of the divorce case in court, like child custody and support matters, but more practical and everyday concerns may also dominate the parties’ interactions, such as the emotional well-being of the children involved. While the well-being of common children may get much attention from each of the parties to a divorce action, they may also be dealing with feelings of anger, resentment, and stress. These feelings may affect their actions more than they realize, and may impact their children more than they know. Here, WebMD discusses five common mistakes that divorced parents make that can have a negative impact on their children.
Going through a divorce can mean different things to different people. Some may see it as a traumatic past event that they want to move beyond and never think of again. Others may see it as a valuable learning experience, taking the opportunity to reflect on what happened in the marriage and applying the lessons to future relationships. Still others undoubtedly lie somewhere in between these two extremes.
Divorce May Show What Makes Marriage Work
The fact of the matter is, while divorce can certainly be a trying experience to endure, there can be many valuable lessons the experience ultimately teaches parties about the concept of marriage. As a recent article from a popular online new source points out, there are a number of things that parties to a divorce can use to gain perspective on what types of things work and do not work in marriage. Those who have been through the process offered their own insight as to what they learned from divorcing, and some of the pieces of advice follow:
Many people who have been through the process of divorce may consider it one of the worst times in their life. Anything from contentious legal battles to lingering bitter feelings about the marriage can contribute to this view. However, not everyone has the same experiences with divorce. Some see it as a new beginning and another chance at being happy. According to a recent article, a family law attorney from Arizona published a book framing the concept of divorce in a new light, and urging others to do the same.
Path to a Happier Life
The book referenced above focuses on talking about the process of divorce as a pathway to a happier life. The book reportedly contains strategies that people who are divorcing can employ in order to more easily navigate the process of divorce and move on with their lives, all while seeing such change as a positive thing. The author’s purported desire with the book is to reshape the conversation about divorce, especially in the beginning stages. She suggests that if people are able to change their thinking about divorce in this way, they may approach the process of divorce in a more collaborative and healing way, which can lead to more positive outcomes. This new approach would ideally serve to better support each family member after divorce, children and adults included.
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